Day 12: Bashkim and Ally

Bashkim...

I have two times where I've had to be open and talk to someone about something and at least the first time wasn't something i did willingly. Coming out a very bad situation in middle school, I was put into reference to go see a social worker when I entered into high school. At first when I was called down, I didn't really know what I was being called down for. I though it was possibly for a program I was in or a teacher was looking for me. Then when I walked into Mr. Gobak's office (social worker), I knew that all the positive posters on the wall and quotes about happiness and acceptance meant I had to be in a social worker's office. I hated being there right on the spot but I did sit through the session and let him ask me questions on me and how I felt about my life. Of course I said I had to complains and that life was going good, which was the biggest lie. My brother was just getting out of prison and was staying home with us which didn't make me happy at all. But I'm not the kind to honestly admit when I'm not feeling OK. But surprisingly, Mr. Gobak was a very big help for me as time passed. I saw him both my freshman and sophomore year until he moved to another school. I was devastated that he was leaving but knew he could help other kids like me. Another time would have to be here. A lot of times in my summaries or blog responses, I tend to tell a little of my experiences just to kind of get it off my chest but also just show that I'm not a perfect person, but I also want to encourage others to be open as well. I think it's always better to open yourself up and just let people know what's going on. You may think that they don't have a clue what you're going through and sometimes they don't, but just knowing that you have someone who cares and is worried about you really helps. If I didn't at least have one person I know I could tell anything to and they'd listen, I'd most likely go insane. So I do suggest that people open up because too much holding it in can hurt you in the long run... Trust me.

Ally....

Marji did come across a couple of times where people judged her on her race and on her looks. One time, she was confronted by a nun who confronted her about eating from a pot. But instead of just telling her to use a bowl, she insults Marji's people by saying how she knew Iranians had no education. That infuriated Marji to think that someone of higher authority as desecrating her people when all she was doing was eating noodles from a pot. another time, she was at a party and the day after she overhears these girls talking about her in the other booth. They were talking about how ugly they thought she was, how she never talked about her parents or country, and how the only thing that made her even remotely interesting was the fact her country was in war and she was just a witness. But already Marji wasn't going to have any of that. She yelled back at that nun and accused her of being a prostitute before and told those girls that if they didn't shut up, she would make they herself. That as much mean things as they said about her, she was proud of being Iranian.But even though she says this, I feel like Marji is just going to very proud of her true self even more. Just because of the fact that so many people shun her and treat her like her being Iranian and different doesn't make her fit to be in Austria and around their social group but she's going to go out there and show them that their opinion doesn't matter to her anymore. The words that her grandmother told are much more important. I don't really judge people cause I know every one is different in their own way. I'd have to say that I have been judged just by the way I look sometimes. Like with this whole "emo" trend that's going around, in high school a lot of people would come up to me and ask if I was sucidal or cut myself or listened to "devil" music. Honestly at first I got upset but after a while I just felt like I just had to learn from it. It just taught me that judging people just makes them feel weird and hurt sometimes. So that's why I don't judge and I try to be accepting of other people's differences.